Conscious

There are certain things you don’t want to see.

The day was June 25th. After a tedious day at work, I walked back to my car. It’s around 11 ‘O clock. I longed to reach home. All I wanted was a good sleep to relieve me of the work pressure.

I slowly lay on the four-poster as my back ached under the day’s strenuousness. My eyelids were heavy and they slowly dropped dead. In the subconscious mind’s eye I was further able to see the necrosis of my senses.

Why is it different today? Have I stretched myself beyond the endurance levels? Why do I feel like a dead body? Why do...

Amidst these thoughts, the subconscious vision blurred and everything was blank and dark.

I didn’t know what time it was at night but I was back to my senses when I heard a flapping sound. A bird?

The room was dimly lit under the streaks of light from the street-lamp. The bed, actually a four-poster was close to the window and I lay half-asleep on it. My bones ached under the sleep induced laziness but my mind was conscious of the surroundings.

The blades of the fan cut through thin air making a swirling sound. Outside the window, the crickets were chirping and the leaves, rustling due to the wind. Where did I hear the flapping from? Must be from the tree outside the window.

I looked out of the window, still lying on the bed when I saw a silhouette spread its giant arms, at least 50 of them. No birds were perched on its arms. And since I was unable to learn the origin of the flapping sound, I tried to get back to sleep.

A few minutes later, I was disturbed by the sound of footsteps which subsequently became more clear, indicating that somebody was walking towards my room.

I concentrated, to make sure that I wasn’t hallucinating. There are two doors in the line of sight which needs to be crossed to reach my bedroom and I constantly stared at them. My heartbeat increased and I started to breathe heavily. I was waiting impatiently for that person to turn up at first door whence I could plan an evasive action.

The drapes at the first door were slightly pushed aside and I knew that the person had reached. I tried to push my body off the bed but it refused to move. It took me a while to understand that I was seized by a bout of paralysis. My whole body was numb, though I was conscious.

All I could do was to wait and watch. As I kept staring at the door, a white figure emerged from behind the drapes and walked towards me with calculated tread. She had long hair which fell over her face and so I couldn’t see her.

The air became colder as she approached me. I trembled under fright. And I had no other option but to watch. She came close to the four-poster and pulled back her hair.

My eyes enlarged under fright on seeing her face. Her face resembled mine but was chillingly frightening. It was pale and her lips were white devoid of any blood. She was very lean and had a scar, an open wound running across her forehead. Blood trickled down her eye as she slowly bent down.

But what terrified me even more was her voice. She was screaming in an unknown language. And the scream slowly converted into a growl. The only thing I could understand was that she’s in excruciating pain and that she was trying to convey something to me.

She lifted her head and looked at the frame of the four-poster.

And what I saw scared me to death. A huge raven perched on one it, flapping its wings continuously. Its eyes were burning like red ambers.

Even before I could raise an alarm, the bird swooshed down to my side and without any warning pecked my eye with its sharp beak. I was screaming at the top of my voice. Neither could I nor anybody else hear my screams.

I slithered in pain as she spread her arms like wings and continued to laugh. The bird was looking at me with its blood dripping beak. It slowly spread its wings and in a single flap made its way to the top.

I turned to my side and she was gone too. I wondered if all this happened for real but for the pain that was inexplicable. I could feel the blood trickling down my eye ball and wet the bed beneath me. Fear was conquered by pain.

I still lay helpless waiting for someone to help. But to no avail. And then my worst fears came true when I looked above me. She was floating in thin air, above me. She slowly came closer to me. ‘I will do whatever you say. I will help you,’ I meekly submitted.

And she started to laugh hysterically and gave out a loud cry before rushing into my body and merging with me. My body jerked violently before I felt a stinging pain in my arm.

I heard more voices as I tried to see what’s going on around.

A few days later I was discharged from the hospital. On the ill-fated day of June 25th, I crashed into an oncoming vehicle, as I was trying to overtake another vehicle ahead of me, causing a severe spinal atrophy. The debris damaged my eye which was operated upon the same night. Doctors said that I miraculously survived the crash. Even more miraculous was the fact that my pulse dropped to zero and when they thought I wouldn’t survive after their attempts turned futile, I suddenly started vibrating and the pulse regained to its normalcy.

I understand that it was my subconscious mind that was still awake while I was being operated upon in the hospital. And the disconnect between the conscious and subconscious minds deluded me to see the horrors that night.

But there is one thing that matters me even to this day whenever I stand infront of the mirror and see the scar on my forehead. The duty doctor who attended to my treatment when I was rushed from the accident site, maintains that I never had a wound or a scar on my forehead.